


The Melody of a Fallen Tree

by weirdbitterdays



Category: What We Do in the Shadows (TV)
Genre: FWB, M/M, help them they're dumb and horny, hookups can lead to unexpected emotions, just dudes being guys, mild pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-09
Updated: 2020-06-09
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:21:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,248
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24614431
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/weirdbitterdays/pseuds/weirdbitterdays
Summary: Lazslo and Nandor have been friends with benefits for centuries. It's fun. Nandor is starting to have more Serious Thoughts about someone else unfortunately.Set immediately after 2.09(never thought i’d be writing semi-serious porn about a comedy show about vampires, but here we are, and baby we’re alright)
Relationships: Guillermo/Nandor the Relentless (What We Do in the Shadows TV), Laszlo Cravensworth/Nandor the Relentless
Comments: 15
Kudos: 130





	The Melody of a Fallen Tree

Lazslo closed the bedroom door on the cameras, leaving the two vampires alone to attend to certain matters. And certain matters were certainly about to get attended to. He reached out to Nandor’s comically erect crotch, gently handling his rock hard cock through his velvet trousers.

"My, what do we have here?" Lazslo asked with a familar, heated look. Nandor laid his hands on Lazslo's shoulders, relishing the attention, his pupils dilated and eyes glinting, with a crooked grin. "Those witches always go about this in the nastiest way, I swear.” Lazslo remarked in disappointment, giving Nandor a squeeze. “Semen extraction is meant to be a joyous affair.” He looked up at Nandor, smiling, rubbing him.

"Stupid witches." Nandor agreed, reaching up to run a hand through Laszlo's shaggy hair while rocking into the very needed attention on his cock. "Come here," Laszlo said as he leaned in to Nandor's face, giving him a gentle peck, then traced his lips along the bottom of Nandors, his eyes closing. With an uumph Nandor pulled Laszlo closer, flushing them together from tip to toe. Lazslo moaned quietly, deepening the kiss, their tongues exploring each other's mouths.

It had been a few months since they'd hooked up last, (or was it years? Nandor wasn't great with time. It had been a while), but they had always been a little more than just friends, since they first met at that masquerade-ball-turned-orgy oh so many centuries ago. Not that he was mentioning it to anyone. It was just convenient having a roommate down for the occasional erotic spin. This certainly wasn’t the first time Laszlo had come to Nandor’s elegant chambers after a particularly heated spat with Nadja, or simply out of pure horniness. They rather appreciated their casual intimacy; it had given them something quiet and special between them. Recently Nandor had started to feel a little twinge of guilt, though, an ache for something or someone else when Laszlo approached him this way. He ignored the feeling as the he rocked into Lazslo, though, the cursed erection gifted by the witches needed to be dealt with.

Lazslo trailed kisses and nibbles down his chin, his neck.  
"Watch the teeth..." Nandor murmed reproachfully. Lazslo chuckled.  
"Since when did a little bite bother you?" He murmured back, raising his eyebrows. Nandor titled his head gently, conceding this point. He gasped as Lazslo lapped and nipped at the tender flesh of his neck, eliciting rumbling groans from Nandor’s body.

Nandor felt his hands cascading down Lazslo's sides, gently massaging him as he went, ending up at the front of his trousers. He palmed Lazslo through his velvet pants and Lazslo hummed appreciatively, rocking into his touch, thankful for the attention to his aching erection. He removed his lips from Nandor’s neck and looked up at the bearded fool for a moment before Nandor wasted no time in popping Lazslo's erection out of his pants, immediately administering gentle strokes down his soft yet firm length, rubbing his thumb over the sticky tip, trailing up and down him with his fingernails, and settling into a firm grip. Lazslo groaned, his lips curling, a devilish grin on his face. There was a reason he wrote so many songs about this exact moment.

Nandor quirked an eyebrow, and Lazslo quirked his back. Without a word, Nandor dropped to his knees, taking Lazslo in his mouth. "Oh yes." Lazslo's other hand reached up to Nandor's head, gently guiding him up and down his length. Lazslo knew he wouldn’t last long, and was looking very forward to the release of this build up.  
Nandor looked up at him, sliding his tongue and lips up and down Lazslo, right hand coming up to cover the part of Lazslo’s cock that his mouth couldn’t reach. Lazslo knew he was close. He pulled a little harder on Nandor’s hair, making him close his eyes and whine slightly.

“Why don’t you take your cock out there, friend?” Nandor popped off Lazslo’s cock and made eye contact with him as he pulled himself out of his trousers with unabashed arousal. He took himself in hand, stroking slowly a few times, giving Lazslo an eyeful. Lazslo was breathing very heavy, and stroked himself in response, not wanting to go even a moment without stimulation. Nandor leaned forward and took him back in his mouth, pumping with vigor this time, stroking himself with equal earnest.  
Lazslo’s face pinched, almost quicker than expected.

“Nandor, I’m about to -” He cut himself off with a blissful groan, pumping into Nandor’s mouth, hot down his throat. Nandor couldn’t hold back, with gratefulness, himself tipping over the edge, spilling onto his hand and the maroon carpet, shockwaves of pleasure pulsating through him. His orgasm eventually subsided, and he laid his head against Lazslo’s stomach, allowing himself a moment for his breathing to get back to normal, feeling utterly spent. Lazslo, equally spent, gently caressed the top of Nandor’s head in affection.  
After a moment they separated, Lazslo looking around the room.

“Say, do you have any -” He started to ask, when Nandor interrupted him, knowing what he was looking for.  
“In the cabinet over there.” He pointed distractedly to an ornate armoire in the corner. It was usually Guillermo who used that cabinet, Nandor thought, unbidden. Guillermo, who tended Nandor’s things; washing his clothes, putting them away all nice and tidy, oh Guillermo.

Lazslo opened the cabinet, removing a few small towels from it, turning around and throwing one at Nandor, who caught it easily and began wiping down his face, then hand.  
Lazslo also wiped himself clean, putting himself back in his pants.

“Well, that was entirely necessary and rather lovely.” Lazslo said with his classic vigor.

“Yes, thank you, Lazslo.” Nandor murmured, giving him a small smile, but not looking him directly in the eye. “Again, I am sorry you and Nadja are in a fight currently.” He said, giving Laszlo an understanding look. Lazslo waved his hand, truly not perturbed.

“Oh it’s fine, she’ll get over it tomorrow when she remembers that she was the one who slept with Lillith first.” He replied, a wistful grin on his face. Suddenly snapped back to the present, he stood kind of awkwardly. “Well, I guess I’d better - “ He gestured towards the door with his thumb.

“Oh yes, most definitely. Thank you again, Lazslo. Don’t forget we have a house meeting tomorrow at 3 AM. Have a dreadful slumber.”

“How could I forget?" Lazslo replied with a subtle side-eye, turning towards the door. "You sleep well, old chap.” He said, then quietly made his exit, closing the door softly behind him as to not wake Nadja in her coffin down the hall.

Nandor let out a sigh he hadn’t realized he was holding and got up from the ground, picking up the towel Lazslo had left on the settee and walked to the clothes hamper, where Guillermo would pick them up in the morning for laundry. He rubbed his thumb distractedly over the soft fabric, his eyes glazing over. He felt weird. For the first time, he didn’t know if he could do this again, like this, with Lazslo. It didn’t seem fair, but he didn’t exactly know why. It just felt so empty. Lazslo didn’t care for him, not really. Not like - 

With a jerk, he threw the towels in the hamper, bounding to his coffin, getting in while still wearing his day clothes, and shutting the lid with a thud.


End file.
